Running Time: Four fidgets per minute even though I was on the front row. An embarrassing four fidgets a minute. A painful four fidgets per minute. The fidgets had absolutely nothing to do with the running time, for what was quite a marvellous film. The fidgets, I suspect were linked to the fact that I had been sitting in an upright position for eight hours out of a total of nine hours. It was like the cinema seat had hold of the bottom of my spine and was spinning me around by it, over and over again and when it was not doing that, it was slowly snapping just above my tush.
Protagonist’s Myeloma Survival: The protagonist, an aged man, could quite easily have been living with myeloma. He walked like he had myeloma. If he did have myeloma, he probably would have had to take more standing breaks in his drive from Montana to Lincoln, Nebraska. I have a feeling, it is a drive longer than the one to London to Deeping. Much of the cast looked like they were the key myeloma demographic, so their survival rating was pretty average.
Fellow Audience: Considerate. I would have annoyed me if I were next to me, fidgeting back and forth, side to side in my Afro. I’m no petite angel. Anyway, it was not a sci Fi, so I was sitting at either side of me. They were called ‘strangers’. Okay, the older gentlemen to my left, sort of got me back by reading anything out loud that appeared on screen. At first I thought his companion was blind. He wasn’t, for he too decided to tell us that the protagonist and his son were at a motel. The man to my right was seeing more films than I was. I am still jealous.
Trivia: Alexander Payne would make an amazing guest at a dinner party. He makes amazing movies, well, The Descendants not so much.
Tired Rating: Nothing compared to the pain rating, which as I made the walk out of the cinema to the cash point to get the necessary taxi home, made me cry in pain. It was nice to cry about something physical. The tiredness did not really hit me until I got home and took some Oralmorph. The pain was so bad, I broke on of my rules.